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Category Archives: love

I stand alone, confined within this space
But only your eyes see my disgrace
I cannot swallow my shameful regrets
A painful wind – it steals my breath

I hate the way that I constantly behave
I am lost even though I am saved
To flee this world and all it brings
When I die will my soul have wings?

Why do I stumble?
Why do I lie?
Without you Lord
I cannot fly

I am this fool
Flat on my face
I want to run
Out of this place

Why do I laugh?
When I should cry
I am so lost
This hurt inside

My soul screams out, stands up to fight
Choking tears now drown my life
Where is your light?
Jesus I am missing you tonight

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Standing in bedroom last night talking to my wife,
I can see the heartbreak in her eyes.
She had been wanting something for so long and
all signs pointed to it’s coming. She looks at me and asks,
“Why does God not like me?” I tell her right away,
“God loves you more than anyone ever could.”

She says, “Why did He break His promise to me?
I have wanted this for so long and I knew that the Pastor
on TV was speaking to me. I knew it was time.”
I told her, “God does not break promises and trust
His word and not the words of man.” She counters,
“He speaks through people though.”
“Yes He does”, I said, “He may have been speaking to someone else.”

Then she was silent. I have never seen her faith so tested and her heart so torn before.
I then looked up at this very old picture that her Grandmother had given to us.
It was a picture of Jesus with two sheep, one on each side of Him and He was holding a lamb in His arms. I told my wife as I pointed to the picture, “I would do anything to take away your hurt, but only He can repair the tear in your heart.”

My wife looks at me with tears in her eyes and says, “He does not speak to me. He only stands there with that lamb in His arms.” In the most gentle and loving way I could speak to her I said, “Sweetheart, that lamb in His arms is you.”

I proclaim the name of Jesus as my Savior, my
Redeemer, my Giver, and Bearer of salvation!
I will stand my ground; my conviction shall
not be shaken, as I joust with malicious nations!

They can strike God from justice, academics
and country, but they will not remove God from my heart!
As the wails of their souls seek Abbadon’s flame,
my Grandeur, the In dweller of my vitality, shall never depart!

The highest peaks, the deepest abyss,
are minuscule to the adornment I have for you!
That I would rather perish, then to relinquish,
the heavenly mansion that vaults from your Truth!

I will love you, my God, through all shadows
of my earthly existence and trials of faith!
To bow down and uplift the majestic Glory,
the magnificent marvel my soul awaits!

Jesus is my Savior! My great King of
my life’s duty and blessed Ambassador!
This is my manifesto, my oath, as the residue
of my former self is unaccompanied forevermore!

DG 2009

Tired of playing games like I am innocent
Lost days and ways that my time was spent
Sand castles, spinning tassels, whining my way through all life’s hassles

So sick of guilt, man up, face up to it
My picture window has had a brick thrown right through it
Thorns and thistles, weeping and gnashing, without Christ my life is crashing

I’m put back together with invisible scars
Trying to find out who you really are
Seeking answers to understand; the innocent man with His blood on my hands

Still banging my head on the mantle of my life
Still slothful and fearful of what is right
Still prideful, selfish, and too stupid to realize this truth…

I am tired of me…

My heart is a hazard and a cleft that widens each day
My anxiety swells to shamed, almost infinite pain
Freely I lay my transgressions and doubts by the way
My contradictions and uncertainties I always entertain

To take these from my strained heart, why would you?
To give me this inner peace in a baneful and vicious dwelling
Extracting the stains of a selfish past, why do you?
Where vigor lacks, my weakness for your love is swelling

Unanswered questions find truth in due time
The waiting is what inhibits my sense from serenity
That my heart can be unsoiled and also my mind
To take all misfortune and give a torn man dignity

My love for you is unquestioned and sincere
My faith in myself is my burden of ignorance
I just have to question, why do you hold me so dear?
Is it because your sacrifice bares our resemblance?

I carry on throughout tiredness and hesitation
A fall from the realms of greater and honorable men
I must fulfill my life’s worth and seek destination
Please exonerate me as I lay it down before you again

I am broken, fragmented, and much doubt lingers
As I come to you with bent hands and nimble fingers.
This darkness, the invisible love at which I stare
Knees to be bruised from the amount of much needed prayer.

I seek a trance, that your Spirit will overwhelm my frame.
That you grant lenience to my life, my faults, and my name.
The shadows that fill this room, they are not my own.
To hear the breath of your angels saying, “you are not alone”.

That forgiveness is too much to ask for and acquire
As I fate myself to descend from human, into heavenly desire.
I pray that you will forget, that my iniquity be consumed
As my heart amplifies His words, “with Me you are immune“.

Sharing a few things that pop in my head from time to time…

“I have no validation. “I” within Christ gives me a valid, meaningful life.”

“I cannot stand love. I cannot stand it to the point that I cannot live without it.”

“I do not give a damn what this world thinks. I only have to please God, so take your hate elsewhere.”

“Through all of my trials and downfalls, He is always right there waiting.”

“It really is amazing how much your ears open when your mouth is shut.”

“If you find that you love yourself more than others, you have sealed your destiny.”

“Pray for this man that fails to stop and tumbles over every cliff.”

“When you find success in faith, you find success in your life.
Just remember your success depends on where your faith is.”

“You don’t need your cake, why have it and eat it?”

“If the words God has blessed me with, brings one soul to Christ,
then it would be the greatest compliment to my life.”

“You have never laid eyes upon me, but I love and pray for you all.”

Christ
Savior
Christ
Yeshua
The destiny of the human
race was acknowledged by
His love for it. Jesus acquired
death to give us life; God.
Christ
Savior
Christ
Yeshua
Christ
Savior
Christ
Yeshua

L onging to inquest your heart where it’s end has no duration.
O vertly compelled to meld our souls in exquisite collaboration.
V eraciously attentive to the fragility of your amiable breath.
E ndless, I pursue assiduously in life, exceeding death.

The energy of love and it’s defiance to be
understood is what makes it so utterly astounding.
Thoughts from the human mind cause emotions
to intermix, contradict, and repel one
another. They cause pain, fear, confusion,
joy and all the fluctuations in between.
The mind can make you irrational, unrealistic,
and foolish.

It can bring sorrow when there is none,
doubt with no issue, and weakness without
the loss of strength. It can bend and mold
in unhealthy ways, and make misery where
it has no company. The mind is as logical
as it is illogical, bound as it is free,
and ingenuously stupid. The mind is the
most amazing and revolting part of our human
anatomy.

The heart on the other hand, makes you
physically feel true emotions abound,
transcend, and it can mesmerize you.
Does the mind let the heart take over
in matters of love?
Why is it felt in our chest, in the
deepest part of it? It seems as though
the greatest decisions come from the heart,
it seems to fuel the conscious, feed the
soul, and make love outstanding.

To fathom the deepness of the habitual
traits of true love and constantly finding
happiness and sensual bliss with one person
for multitudes of years is astounding.
To walk each path of life together no matter
which way the fork leads and to form a bond
so strong that death could not break it,
reveals that love is unconquerable.
No human love is perfect, if it were it would
cease to exist, but what are these
connections, these ties that bind us to a
person and conforms us to them until our
last word is spent?

No love is simple, but more complex at
times than answers to the universe. It
causes a person to perform the most idiotic
and most amazing performances the world
has ever seen. Love has no boundaries,
no limit, and has endless possibilities.
Love can take and give life without question.
It is by far the most misunderstood, most
necessary, and strangest of all emotions
we know. Love is the brightest light and
the darkest chasm a human must endure.

You would count every star for just a glance.
You would count every blade of grass for
just one touch. You would catch every
raindrop to keep them dry and warm.
That is what true love is. It is so
difficult to contain it. If someone tells
you that you are a fool in love, take that
as a compliment. It may mean they envy
you and are jealous of the feelings you
have discovered. It is a blessing and a
curse. It is a double-edged sword that cuts
you no matter which way you handle it.

Be thankful that you have them and do not
forget that. If you do not have love,
do not fret, it will be at your doorstep
soon enough. Apologize when you are wrong
and do not be selfish when you are right.
You cannot control it. Just hold on for the
ride and see where it takes you.

It truly is the greatest gift bestowed upon
human beings. We constantly take it for
granted and do not always use it for what
it was intended. People tend to give up on
love after their heart has been torn out and
kicked around. They adamantly defy it, do
not want it, but then, someone opens the
locked door and renews their faith in it.

Love is cleverly deceptive, it can be
wonderful and horrible within the span of
one minute. It causes you to let your guard
down making you do, try, and say things you
never would have before. Love costs nothing,
maybe we should snatch up and use as much as
we can while we still draw breath in this life.
(For the Full Version see God.)